WE GON' PARTY LIKE IT'S MY BIRFDAY

So I'm coming off a birthday/going-away bacchanal that culminated in my birthday celebration and a lunch which served as a denouement.

I didn't attend Katherine's lunch, regrettably. I tossed and turned and couldn't get to sleep until 6 a.m., with the lunch commencing all the way across Austin at 1 p.m. Needless to say, I was up by 12:45 with no hope of making it on time.

Her party Saturday was a blast. I am not exaggerating when I say that's the most leftover liquor I've ever seen at a party (including half a keg), which should give you some indication of what there was to start with. Everyone was sufficiently red-faced but remained composed, we all gulped down alcohol to kill the pain of saying goodbye to KDD, and there was damn fine cake.

Sunday was recuperation day for everyone but Blythe's helpful roommate Joey, who agreed to invite some mates over and work on the keg. Sunday night, I went to pick it up, and there was still I'd guess a quarter left. The sumbitch was really heavy, and after pulling the CRV into Blythe's back yard (as she suggested I do when I delivered it), I got the keg and tub all the way to the car and up against the back. And I began to fully realize how completely, totally, utterly out of shape I am compared to a few years ago.

At some point, I was going to have to lift the keg and tub up high enough to slide into the back of the CRV, about the top of my thigh. I also realized that was going to require rotation of my arms that I didn't think I had the strength for.

I really, really wanted to have beer for my birthday, and I was really, really frustrated that my wishes were being thwarted because my body wasn't cooperating. I was tired, mad, and after getting it to the car, had just enough adrenaline in me to get steamed. Before I knew it, I had rattled off a few f-bombs, snatched the tub handles, lifted from my ample ass and got it in there in one motion, actually amazing myself. And kinda straining a butt muscle. Then I heard Katherine in my head: "CRITIA SMAAASH!" And indeed I did.

Monday was muuuuuuuch better. As I told a friend on the phone, a birthday that starts out with a half keg of beer in your living room isn't a bad day. At 8 we were reclining in a booth at the downtown P.F. Chang's, sampling glorious grub and eating free chocolate cake, thank you Amy. And Tim, the only guy, was chivalrous and paid for us all. So I had a man buy me dinner on my birthday. Again, so far so good.

We walked a block (!) to the Cedar Door, and immediately got tucked in for a night of revelry. Chronicle "Easy Street" ads were read aloud, Mexican Martinis were downed in one, the rest of the crew got there and in all, we had a blast. This sounds silly, but I got cool things from Raeanne and Blythe, who, as Raeanne put it, "went shopping on our desks." I actually preferred those things, since they have a story and belonged to a friend beforehand.

It was really cool to look down the table and see all the people that came out to help me celebrate my birthday. That's really all I wanted, a simple get-together with the gang where we could talk about everything and nothing. It was a great 34th.